Sunday, May 17, 2015

Grandma's Girl

We moved into my parent's house for a few weeks of our homelessness and this little girl has become my mother's sidekick. She loves on her grandma. The other day we all got into the car to run an errand and my mother had to go to her car to get her purse before joining us and Cheeks got a little emotional watching her grandmother walk off without her. She started calling out to her telling her to come back. For a little girl who used to freak out if I left the room this has become a much adored change for all parties.

Monday, May 11, 2015

The End of an Era

Matthew and I have been married for almost ten years and we have never lived anywhere longer than we have in this house (a little less than 3 years). Add to it that Wee Boy was 3 weeks old when we moved in so this is the only house either of our babies have ever known. It was hard to say goodbye to the memories of this house. This is kind of weird to say having grown up a military brat. Houses were just houses. But maybe because I have children now, maybe because I am older, maybe because I actually owned and did fun projects to this house, or maybe because there is still so much uncertainty about our future, but it really feels totally different than any other move. I have LOVED this home. I have loved making it mine, I have loved feeling like a real adult here. I have loved raising my children here. I have LOVED this home. This picture was taken by our packer in the last few minutes before the kids and I loaded into the car to set off. Goodbye Macungie!!!!

Sunday, May 10, 2015

Trials and Blessings

We leave in just a few days. We still have not sold our house. Eeek, I really thought we would be blessed with a quick sale. No love. I can officially say that this is the most stress I have ever felt in my entire life. In just a few weeks we are trying to leave a place we love for so many reasons, sell our house, find a new place for our little family without the luxury of going out to look for ourselves, coordinate a move across the country, and start a new job that hopefully will fit my sweet husband's skills better. It's a lot to do in a relatively short time. Because of the age of our children I won't be staying behind to sell the house by myself while Matthew starts. I'm afraid I might fall to pieces being left by myself with two toddlers so I am following him out shortly after he leaves.

But with the regular stress of doing all of the above, our entire family spent one week suffering from the flu and one week dealing with Cheeks suffering from Hand, Foot and Mouth disease (which meant she screamed through the night for three and a half nights) and left us worried that the rest of us might catch it and/or give it to someone else. I have been trying to get my temple recommend renewed to be able to enter the Lord's Holy House and have spent multiple nights trying and failing to get it accomplished. Have I mentioned that our house is not selling!!!! My children, my dear sweet children, either because they are tired of being neglected while I am on the phone coordinating everything, or they are going through difficult phases, or are sickies, have been less than amiable. Wee Boy is willfully disobedient and Cheeks won't let me put her down. I kind of want to punt them both. I am stressed to my max and wonder when the Lord will show His mighty to save hand.
Yet as I type that with much emotion I know that I am richly blessed.

  • A few weeks ago I got a bit fed up with our realtor in Oregon and called my sweet sister-in-law, Merillee, for a recommendation on a new one. Within the hour I had a new one I could place all confidence in to find me a wonderful new home despite not being there in person.
  • We are looking for houses remotely but I have an angel sister who has on multiple occasions rearranged her schedule to look at homes for me knowing EXACTLY what I will and won't like. She has even taken videos for me so I can feel like I am there too. 
  • After looking at several homes, Matthew just didn't feel comfortable with what I thought was ours. We decided to go back to the 52 house list our realtor had for us and re-search. Within a few hours both Matthew and I knew which one was our house. It was definitely not what we initially had in mind for our new home, but barring our realtor hating it, we were ready to put an offer on it. Thankfully she had good things to say and our offer was accepted as is, no counters.
  • I'm not sure I should be saying this since our house still hasn't sold but I really am grateful that we didn't have showings while my children were sick and otherwise contagious or while Matthew and I couldn't muster enough energy to get out of bed ourselves.
  • The day before our house went on the market two women from church served me in wonderful ways. One took my children for the morning while another came over and helped me clean my house from top to bottom so I could proudly begin showing it to the world.
  • Yesterday another couple from church graciously offered to watch our children for the entire day!!! so Matthew and I could pack the majority of our remaining items without children clambering to help or for attention.
  • This next week after we leave two women (one who already cleaned my house before) are coming over to finish cleaning our house so that it is once again show ready. The song "Have I Done Any Good in the World Today" has come into my head and made me tear up on more than one occasion as I have thought about these dear sweet women.
  • My dear sweet Malesa organized a going away Girls' Night Out on a Thursday night a few weeks ago. Some women I never would have expected came out for the evening expressly to show me how much they love me. I felt richly blessed by these women and deeply felt their love.
  • After hearing about my issues with my temple recommend, a member of the stake presidency came to my home yesterday morning to make sure I had it renewed before I left. You have no idea what a tender mercy this was after the bitter tears I shed over this. I felt the Lord's love so very intensely.
  • Today I said goodbye at my last day of church. It was WAY more emotional than I expected it to be. It took me a long time to fall in love with this ward. But once I did, there were just so many women to LOVE. As I said goodbye I couldn't help but weep at how much I will miss them all. And really what better way is there to leave?
  • With all the stress I have felt I have gone to my scriptures each day during quiet time needing to find peace and strength and never before have I gotten more from them as I have these past few weeks. I have truly feasted on the Word of God and felt strength and comfort flow into my life.
  • Today both Matthew and I received Priesthood Blessings and again felt the comfort and love of our Heavenly Father. I have faith that He has our best interest at heart and that while it doesn't look it right now, everything will work out in a way that will be absolutely perfect for us. Now if I could only keep that peace and comfort with me longer each day I would be golden. Ah the frailty that is human existence.
I am a richly blessed woman. Even through the midst of turmoil, there is peace and joy and beauty. Such beauty.